Get Inspired!

Job Posting:

POSITION: Mom, Mama, Mother, Mommy

JOB DESCRIPTION:

Long term team players needed for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not reimbursed.
Extensive courier duties also required.

RESPONSIBILITIES:

For the rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5.

Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly.

Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from
zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams from the
backyard are not someone just crying wolf.

Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget
repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers.

Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of
multiple homework projects.

Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages
and mental outlooks. Must be willing to be indispensable one product safety
testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys and battery operated devices.

Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.

Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product.

Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout
the facility.

POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT AND PROMOTION:

Virtually none. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without
complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those
in your charge can ultimately surpass you.

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE:

None required, unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually
exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION:

You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due
when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become
financially independent.

When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this
reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could
only do more.

BENEFITS:

While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement,
no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies limitless
opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life if you play your
cards right.

If you would like to add your insprirational story, poem or saying please send them in.

Send Your Inspiration here

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